Why are people so stupid? Seriously, is there something about the winter-time that makes people just retard down to turd level? Why do people also assume that I can read minds, and that my computer somehow knows what new insurance they have, what medicare part D plan they have this month, or why their doctor hasnt called in a refill for their soma?
I got into an argument today with a lady who brought in an Rx for the stupid new Lantus pens. Her insurance didnt cover the pens, they covered the vial. She couldn’t get it through her head that this had nothing to do with the doctor (who gave her a very nice Lantus pen starter kit.. Thanks Sanofi rep you fucktard!) writing for it, but her insurance covering it. She kept on telling me that her Rx had refills, and that he wrote for the pens. I really really really wanted to throw a fucking vial of lantus at her.
Then you have the fuckheads who thinks everything should be free. Thats right, the world revolves around free-ness. Especially bad with the welfare type, its ‘gimme gimme gimme’. This woman got pissed at me because I wouldnt give her 2 bottles of dimatapp DM for her retarded kid instead of one. I kindly explained to her that the insurance would only pay for 1 bottle at a time (1 bottle = month supply) so she decided to get all nasty and uppity. IM FUCKING SORRY that you’re poor. IM FUCKING SORRY you got knocked up at 15 and your life was ruined. IM FUCKING SORRY you cant take responsibility for your own actions and therefore need to yell at ME who pay for YOUR LIFE about shit thats out of my control. Seriously, life isnt free (unlike your crotch.. OOOh dissed!).
Then to top it all off, I got one of those mind-reader types in today. You know, no cards, no nothing. Just a whole lot of bitching and ‘WELL I NEED MY MEDICATION’. Yeah, I need a blowjob, but the state system doesnt pay for that now does it.
Whats up with people not telling their doctors everything when they see them? Say for example that when you take codeine you get seizures. A person with some sense would realize that it should be IMPORTANT to tell their doctor this so they dont write for codeine. But of course, those people dont come to my pharmacy. Lets waste some more of my time while you get angry at me. Another untold secret that I see all the time is pregnancy. When you see your doctor, and you have some glimmer of notion that you might be pregnant, its not good to keep this a secret from your doctor; especially when your doctor is writing you prescriptions. It may be okay to keep it a secret from your parents, your boyfriend/guy/baby-daddy, but never your doctor or your pharmacist. And if you do keep it a secret from your doctor, dont take a dose of medication and THEN call me asking if its okay if its taken with pregnancy. Oh, and that sigh you hear from me when you answer ‘no’ to the question ‘did you tell the doctor about this’ isn’t intentionally trying to make you feel bad, its just my heart breaking that another idiot is having a child.
Thusly ending my day on a nice fruity note involves none other than nurses at the county hospital. Now about a month ago we got this Rx brought in by the county hospital that read:
HCTZ 1 qd #30
Now any medical staff with half a brain would say: “Hey! This has no strength! HCTZ comes in 3 strengths! What gives!”. Well, since I have a whole brain, I said the same thing and faxed a clarification to the hospital. The patient happened to have an old bottle from last month, so I just filled it for the same strength she was on and waited for the clarification. I finally got it, a month later. The nurse called all chipper like she was saving the world and proudly told me that it was the 25mg strength. My response however gave her a solid kick in the nuts. I asked how come it took a whole month, and that how hard is it to ask the dumbass resident (who’s name was on there, i faxed the original) what strength it was? She gave me some attitude about how we faxed it (all 6 times evidently) to the wrong place, and it should of gone to the refill center. That was it. I had enough of this bullshit. This stupid ‘nurse’ got both barrels of county induced slackin on-my-tax-dollar fury. I ground into her like you wouldn’t believe. I told her that what use would faxing it to the refill center do when it was NOT a refill, but they never respond anyways. I told her that I was ashamed to be in the same county as them, that its no surprise that they are going under, and that someone needs to come in and fire the whole lot of them for fucking stupidity. This is unacceptable to take 1 month to answer a 2 second question. I also told her that if I ran MY pharmacy like they ran their institution that I would be out of business in about 2 seconds because of shitty service, but the only reason they are still in business is because MY tax dollars are paying for a shitpot of dead weight that aren’t even fit not only to clean my toliets, but to carry the title of ‘nurse’. I then ended it with ‘SHAME ON YOU’ and hung up. Yes Virginia, I can be an asshole, and consider your day ruined. “The Angry Pharmacist, of all the motherfuckers in the world, you the motherfuckest!”
On a lighter note (a load lightening note no less); while I was taking a shit today, I had an interesting idea. This is sorta DrugNazi‘ish; but ive always wondered what people would do for like a stock bottle of soma or vicodin. Would they eat a potato sack of my shit? Would they shove a champagne bottle up their ass? Would they let me take a dump on their chest, put it in a hotdog bun, and eat it while singing showtunes? Since it’ll never get to that point (I tend to like my license, thanks) I guess i can only wonder.
In closing, i’m grateful (for the public’s sake) that I dont have the ability to kill people with my mind.
- Paying the PBM’s to service them.
- Im dreaming of a Crackhead Christmas.
- SOMABOTS, TRANSFORM!
- A pharmacist example for non-pharmacists.
- Trying to not kill your patients.
- An open letter to my patients.
- The FDA obviously hates the public and needs to lay off the crack pipe.
- How to make your pharmacy career less painful.