Never fails. I write a long rant about some addict and pain pills and no less than 3 months later I have 100 comments that all start with:
“I’m a chronic pain patient that takes 120 norco a month blah blah blah life story life story life story I dont think its fair that you say we are an addicts”. That sounds about as smart as “Hi, I’m black, but I’m not a criminal”. What the fuck people!
Where have I ever said “If you are on opioid x you are an addict”? Seriously, point it out. I’m tired of the whole “I have chronic pain so everyone thinks I’m an addict” pity party that I see more and more of. So here is the post that sets the record straight.
Top signs that us pharmacists (or just me) that you are indeed need either some pain management consultation or just want to put gas in that escalade.
- You cannot divide 90/3 to determine when you are due for your next refill. 90 tablets at 3 times a day is 1 month (30 days). When you run out you are due for a refill. Simple.
- You appear to be either the most unluckiest (or stupidest) person on the planet. Your house gets broken into every other day, your brother runs off with your pain pills, they are vaporized in an auto crash, flushed down the toliet, exploded, maimed, got wet, excuse, excuse, excuse. Then, excuse excuse excuse. “So heres what happened…. excuse excuse excuse”. Not once, oh no, but every fucking month there is some drama or issue involving your pain pills being filled early, not late, but early.
- Sometimes shit happens and you need an early refill once a year, thats cool, I understand. No, this is every fucking month. Get that everyone? Every month.
- When I see your half-awake ass stumble into my store at 2pm and the very first words out of your mouth are “WHEN ARE MY SOMA DUE AGAIN” when you called me an hour ago and completely forgot you asked me the same thing.
- You walk into my store loaded out of your mind. Not just like “feeling good” loaded. I’m talking about harvesting your blood to use in anesthesiology loaded. Eyes are not supposed to roll back in your head or point in different directions when you are attempting to have a conversation with me.
- When I see you walk outside the pharmacy, open up the pill bottle of soma, and GIVE A FEW TO YOUR FRIENDS OUTSIDE THE DOOR. Enough said right there.
- When I say they are too early to be filled, you say “Well I’ll pay cash for them! I’ll pay double cash price!” No way, bribing your pharmacist is not going to get you the pain pills early.
So the take-home message is, unless you obviously make it known that you have an issue, you have no issue.
- Paying the PBM’s to service them.
- Im dreaming of a Crackhead Christmas.
- SOMABOTS, TRANSFORM!
- A pharmacist example for non-pharmacists.
- Trying to not kill your patients.
- An open letter to my patients.
- The FDA obviously hates the public and needs to lay off the crack pipe.
- How to make your pharmacy career less painful.