I know I havent updated in a bit, but to be honest I havent been really angry about anything new and exciting to rant about! I know you would all /hate/ to see me rehash something over and over (*ahem*non-english-speakers*ahem*) but never fear, stupidty came to the rescue!
All pharmacists have been in this situation before:
You’re working along; pissed off at the smelly twat in front of you who wants her soma filled 3 weeks early, when in walks this nicely dressed guy/gal in a suit and tie (or low cut dress and skirt) and just waltz’ right up to the counter.
I rate drug reps about one step lower than used car salesmen. At least used car salesmen know they dont know shit. Drug reps think they know everything under the sun about whatever crap they are throwing back up at you. Its downright silly sometimes. I know some have “degrees” and that crap, but honestly, a drug rep compared to a pharmacist in the therapeutic and pharmacology department.
The worse part is that the doctors just gobble this shit up like no tomorrow. Do doctors have rocks in their heads? Oh wait, we all know the answer to this. Why will a doctor listen to some two-bit twat with a low cut shirt about some drug she has /no/ idea how it works or who covers it and not your local neighborhood pharmacist who deals with this shit day in an day out. Oh wait, we all know the answer to this one too. I need to grow some tits or something.
Doctors are idiots. They will use a product for 20 years without any complaints, but will switch at the drop of a hat when some big tittied blonde comes waltzing in with her porno high heels on. They say “ooooh, but the studies show this one is better.. ooooooooooh”. Look who funded the study you dumbshit, of course its going to say its better when the drug company pushing the shit is footing the bill for the study! When do you see a published paper about a drug where the funding company’s product rates lower than the ‘gold standard’. Wait…. Ultracet, my bad again.
Now dont get me wrong. This only applies to the /new/ drug reps. We had one in the other day, threw some nice pens on the counter and proceeded to bullshit with the two other pharmacists who have known him for 30 years. Not once did he want to talk to me about a ‘study’ that shows ‘my product’ to be superior to ‘their product’. He asked how we’re doing, if we needed anything, and off he went. Excellent.
The new ones however will throw a fistful of studies in your face showing how their product is “better”. Who reads these fucking studies? Its like reading Romeo and Juliet and being surprised that they die at the end! Or watching a Keanu Reeves movie and expecting some good acting! Or reading this blog and expecting me to be happy! We all know they arent going to give you studies that shows their product preforming worse than the current therapies, so why bother reading them.
The best is this new product, I think its called “Proquin XR” or some bullshit like that. Its basically Cipro in a once daily treatment for UTI. Big warnings in the magazines: “THERE IS NO SUBSTITUTION FOR THIS PRODUCT”. My ass their isnt. One phone call saying that this $6/pill magic wonder isnt covered and its getting substuted for a 10 day run of generic cipro for $9 out the door. Drug companies can blow me with their “NO SUB” bullshit. I’m going to fucking sub it regardless what your paper says (with doctor or whatever numbskull will say yes and give me their name’s okay of course).
I hate drug reps so much that when I go to their verbal-masturbation sessions (ie: Free Dinners), I order the most expensive thing on the menu even if I dont like it. Hey, i’m bitter, but i’m not an idiot. A free dinner is a free dinner, and i’ll sleep through a talk to get a $75/plate dinner that I would never have by myself.
Why do drug reps even come into my work. As if i’m going to do what they say. Thats about as smart as refilling a vicodin prescription because the patient said “I talked with the doctor, and he said it was okay to fill”.. “dur dee dur, okay! heres your refill.. duuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”….
The best are the test-machine reps. They come in with their little name-tag, and their little briefcase with their little meters in them. They want me to sit down so they can show me how the meters work (as if I cant figure it out on my own, yanno how different all 10000 meters on the market are). Then they explain to me how wonderful theirs is compared with all the other ones, blah blah blah. Then they give me some post-its (which I like), and those cheap plastic pens. They act all shocked and confused when I ask for the “doctors pens”. You all know, the really heavy ones that come in a nice velvet sleeve. The ones they dont give to us piddly pharmacist. Some just lie and say they dont have any, upon which I ask for the one they are using. Others pony up and walk out to the car to either retrieve one pen, or just get in and drive off leaving me high and dry. I think i’d warm up to drug reps a bit more if they said “oh, if you use this product, i’ll go wash your car!” or “I’ll give you a backrub if you use product X”. “Need the floor swept? Think of Diovan!”
Doctors need to start prescribing based upon good judgement and their pharmacological training (haaaaaa haaaa!) and not based upon what some dirty multi-kerzillion dollar company tells them to prescribe.