I had a run-in with an intern that just made my blood boil.  I’m not sure if they do exit testing at these colleges before they give kids their PharmD’s, but someone obviously dropped the ball with this one.

I call for a copy to a Large Chain store.  Who answers the phone was an intern who could barely speak english, let alone speak loud enough to be heard over the ambient store noise in the background.   I asked for a copy.  He said to hold on as I could hear him ask the pharmacist on duty (who again, couldn’t speak english to save her life) how to do that.  I jokingly said “Oh, you must of just gotten your intern license” to which he said “No, I’m a graduate Intern”.  A part of my soul died a bit when I realized that someone who graduated from pharmacy school (but has not passed the boards yet) didn’t know how to give a fucking copy.

I sat there on the phone (not even on hold) for 5 min while the pharmacist bok-bok’d to the poor stupid intern on what information was needed to give a copy.  My patience died by the second.  The explanation given was not a “here is it on the screen because you are new to the computer system”, it was “He needs this info and this info, wait, lemme write this down, this info and this info”.  This is a fucking graduate intern, someone with a fucking PharmD!  Now I wont mention what school this dork was from since I ragged on them enough for their White Coat Ceremony, but be aware that I was not happy with what they had churned out for 500 zillion dollars in tuition.  You may have your fancy white coat, but we know how much that’s worth when giving a copy.

My question is WHY are pharmacy schools giving degrees to these idiots who obviously have no clue what they are doing in a retail setting?  Isn’t this what internship/rotations are for, to get this shit out of the way BEFORE they get the shiny doctorate?  Isn’t there some sort of exit test given to make sure these idiots are worthy of the degree?  Obviously not, painfully apparent.

When interns graduate, I expect them to know the basic duties of a retail pharmacist.  I could give a fuck if they can recite the kinetic data for vancomycin, that as useful as tits on a boar when I call for a copy and you don’t know how.

You should know upon becoming free of the shackles of formalized education:

• How to give a fucking copy
• What the basic error messages are for insurance companies and how to possibly troubleshoot them (missing invalid group number/person code/etc
• What a fucking BIN and PCN number are
• What the AWP and Direct Price mean
• How to give a fucking copy
• How to give a fucking copy
• How to speak english so I don’t need a fucking translator or have you repeat 100 times
• How to speak up and not mumble like some stroke patient
• How to give a fucking copy
• Determine how much anal lube is needed for the PBM’s reimbursement (ha!) of various drugs
• How to take an Rx over the phone that’s given at 100 words per min
• How to fucking SPEAK UP so i can HEAR YOU without turning my phones volume up to atomic.  Nothing bugs me more than someone who fucking mumbles softly on the phone.

Pharmacists who hire said idiot intern, what the fuck are you doing not teaching this buffoon how to give a fucking copy?  Why didn’t you rip the phone from his hands, apologize profusely, call him a fucking idiot (he is an intern) and give me the copy as to not waste my time instead of instructing him WHILE  I WAS ON THE PHONE.  My time is not so YOU can teach him something he should know.  Have him come work with me for a week, I guarantee he will either know everything about retail or realize that his PharmD and schooling was a big fucking waste of money.

Pharmacy school who received money to train said idiot, what the fuck are you teaching him?  This isn’t a wonderful clinical land where EVERYONE goes and does clinical work like you think.  Pharmacists should be geared towards RETAIL since that’s where 90% of us go.  I hear that students only get 1 class in retail pharmacy? Yeah, we know how much that helped.  If I taught that class, he would of failed it.

And to the people who think I’m too harsh: You’re not a pharmacist (obviously) so you have NO idea whats going on and should really just keep quiet.