Angry Tweets for 2011-01-15

  • Hooray! Its Crackhead Friday! #
  • I agree with @pokey_pineapple – Scrubs really needed a pharmacist on the show. #
  • Sorta wanna create an asshat forecast site. Login with FB/Twitter, post how assy your day was, track trends over time. #
  • Abbott, go fuck yourself for your CSR reps telling us we are distro recalled strips when the pt picked them up 4 MONTHS BEFORE THE RECALL. #
  • Wait until m Abbott Rep comes in. I hope she brought kleenex to wipe the tears from the ass-chewing im going to give her. #
  • The people who have a problem with our (med people's) tweets need to LEAVE THEIR FUCKING HOUSE and GET A JOB WORKING WITH THE PUBLIC. #
  • If you brag to me that you go to the pill-park to buy PCP, then your vicodin can be filled NOT ONE SECOND before its due. #
  • Everyone is wearing coats and this asian chick is in a sundress with HUGE AMOUNTS OF MAKEUP. $5 me holla? #
  • If you are going to smoke, make it count. Smoke crack! #
  • When we're all dead and gone, aliens will look at the content of the twitter servers and conclude that we didn't deserve to survive. #
  • Friday Fuck You to Abbott Diabetic Testing Customer Service. Thanks for throwing me under the bus to save your own fuckups. #
  • Pt: "But I'll die if I dont have my meds and I cant afford them" Me: "YOU should of thought of that before YOU let YOUR card expire." #
  • Guess I slept through that class in school where Im responsible for all aspects of your life. #
  • Im going to ask during a consult "Did you eat breakfast? Wipe your ass? Shower? Oh, no on the shower". #
  • If I had to drive 25 min's to pick up $300 worth of goods for FREE, i'd do cartwheels. #
  • But oh no, this twatmuffin decides to bitch because she has to drive ALL THE WAY BACK. Wah, you're making $300/hr #
  • And no, I didnt have to order anything, its for Insulin, 3 bottles, 10 days too early. No sig changes. #
  • I spoke with a nice med resident today. He thanked me for putting up with his patients bullshit. Sorta made my day. #
  • When I talk about a 30 day supply to a patient, I very well should be explaining Vancomycin kinetics to them. #
  • I get the same blank stare for both conversations. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-14

  • Dermatologists are notorous for being huge pharmacy money-holes with their trade-name only shit. I hates them. #
  • Thanks for that Solodyn coupon doc. I'll buy half of a lunch at mcdonalds with the profit I made from that. #
  • Nurse: "EEf we give her 1 munth supply at every 8 ours. How many dat be?" Me: "Uh, 90" Nurse: "OOf! tuuu mosh! geev hir 2 week! how dat be?" #
  • Man, its Tardy Thursday. Woman cried at me because her metformin 500 daily was going to kill her if she couldn't test 5 times daily. #
  • A patient freaking out b/c he was turned down for BC life insurance is NOT an "Emergency Phone Call" for a pharmacist. #
  • If I got my MD, I would be the voltron of medicine. Actually I'd probably go to anest. #
  • The study that got PPA pulled from the market is about as retarded as the Autism study. #
  • Anyone who uses the verbal term 'migs' instead of 'M G / Milligrams' needs a punch in the throat. #
  • On my tombstone: "Ive been out for 6 months, but all of a sudden its a BIG FUCKING EMERGENCY that I get my drugs RIGHT NOW" #
  • "Prior Auth Required" is insurance speak for "Fuck Yo Couch!" #
  • A "nursing student" just demanded to see the Rx to yell at me that the MD wrote for Diflucan but I dispensed Fluconazole. #
  • Man, with the arguments that I've gotten into today people still wonder why I carry a gun to my car with me 🙁 #
  • What a great day, saved an idiot from killing himself and thereby saving the taxpayer thousands of dollars. *sigh* #
  • HAHAH Boss just came up to me and said "Is it just me, or is today Fucktard Thursday?" #
  • I like facebook chatting random friends and watching them go "OMFG ITS THE ANGRY PHARMACIST" #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-13

  • I had a pretty good twitter day today. I made myself laugh. #
  • Doctors, do not have your staff call in Rx's unless they can speak clear english. #
  • I just spent the last 10 min's crowbaring out a drug name and strength from this non-english-speaking MD staff. Waste of my fucking time. #
  • Purell is "Gentle enough for doctors to use throughout the day". Gee, thats a selling point. #
  • Purell: Safer alternative to chopping off your hands after pt brings you used vaginal applicator. #
  • Purell: When "No maam, I dont need to see that" isn't an option. #
  • Purell: When you're afraid to ask why that Rx bottle is greasy. #
  • Purell: Buying TAP a Rolex for all the good press he's giving you. #
  • Purell: Summer, 500 lb woman, wallet in bra, need I say more? #
  • Purell: No bottle is big enough when dealing with the public #
  • Purell: No bottle large enough for those damp Rx's for Lomotil. #
  • Purell: "Can you throw this away for me?" #
  • Purell: For after you're finished "signing" that new Medco contract with your ass. #
  • Since I have a bunch of doctors on here, do you really recommend Purell? #
  • You know advertisements that state '3 out of 4 doctors recommend this', that 1 doctor who doesnt is @BurbDoc #
  • Or that 1 doctor is Andrew Wakefield. Oh, I said Doctor, nevermind. >:) #
  • I dont know why i got stuck on Purell. Oh, its the INSTITUTION SIZE JUG that I just scored. *pump pump pump* #
  • Pt wants me to advance some b/c we havent heard from the Dr. She saw the SAME FUCKING Dr yesterday and got Rx's for 2 new meds. #
  • Im sorry miss, but through the power invested in me by the church of pharmacology, I dub thee too dumb to exist. #
  • I'm sorry maam, but the USS Gives-A-Fuck has left your port a long time ago. #
  • DAW-1? BWAHAHAHHA OH COME ON DOCTOR! HAHAHAHAHA DAW-1!!! HAHAHAHA! *snort* #
  • #medicaideligible Will pay cash for the Actavis brand of prometh with codeine. #
  • #medicaideligible The inability to use common courtesy #
  • #medicaideligible New shoes, dress, nails, hair, purse, iphone – Second hand childrens clothes and a pocketfull of Nix. #
  • "All mah babies be on adderall". Well, since "all your babies" are from different daddies, guess its a problem with you. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-12

  • Standing for 10 hours/day + not being able to poop when you need to = Backside that looks more like mouth of cuthulu than a brown starfish. #
  • Yes, I went there. Rhoids are the one nemisis of pharmacists that they never warned you about in school. BE PREPARED. #
  • This woman is talking WAY to much for this to be an easy Rx fill. #
  • "Free Month" coupons are worth dick if the patient cant afford the medication after the "free month" is used up. #
  • What your pharmacist hears: "Okay, what happened wuz *click* blah blah blah lie lie blah blah blah! blah blah 5 min blah pay cash blah!" #
  • Im looking at emergency food/water supplies and my tech is laughing at me. Guess he's not getting any when the SHTF. #
  • Yes you lack-of-planning-whiny woman. It takes longer than 4 hours for the doc to get the refill auth to us. #
  • I'd make you go without to teach you a lesson about planning, but that requires an IQ above my dogs #
  • The power of "Duh" is strong in this one. Her duh-a-clorian count is above those of master "Duh-da" #
  • Guy starts out with an obnoxious stupid joke, then rolls right into why he needs his vicodin/methadone early. Classy. #
  • How do you hide $1 from a pharmacist? Put it in the PDR. #
  • A tiny part of me is wishing for some huge natural disaster to prove to these entitlement fucks how good they have it with their $4 copays. #
  • Note: "Pt wishes to change to something thats free" Me: "How about a kick in the face?" #
  • Pt: "I dont know when this resident will become a real doctor". Yes, I did defend the resident, "real doctor" my ass. #
  • How do you hide $1 from a pt with fibromyalgia, put it in his non-narcotic pill bottles. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-11

  • Fuck. Its monday. Shoot me. #
  • Today blew donkey cock. Yes, the cock of a donkey. #
  • One of my clerks is sqwaking about something dumb. I'm about ready to give her something substantial to complain about. #
  • If today somehow involved my nuts being crushed in a drawer, it would be the perfect storm of clusterfuckness. #
  • No, you cannot borrow our hand mirror to take to the OB next door so you can "show him something he missed". #
  • Wow, if I go outside I can hear Oregon sobbing. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-09

  • I hate being drunk, sad and sentimental. I'm going to haul my ass to bed and forget this week ever happened before I have a breakdown. #
  • Im going to throw up my hands, say "fuck it" and pass out. Good nite twitter, and to those RPh's working tomorrow: Make me proud. #
  • Woke up and still in a shitty mood. #
  • The rumor mill on twitter is more powerful than all high schools in the world combined. #
  • I blame Sarah Palin for Autism and the Wakefield Study. #
  • Pharmacy needs an official montage song. Something inspiring yet depressing to show the passage of time really fast. #
  • Twitter is like a sewage plant. 99% processed shit but once in a while a grain of corn comes up to the surface to say hello. #
  • Amazing how ppl on twitter blame guns, politics, etc for what happened today instead of a fucked up psychopath. It could happen to anyone. #
  • Remember, its just as easy for a politician to be injured as an RPh/MD for not filling narcotics early. There are fucked up ppl out there. #
  • At birthday party for 12 year old cousin. Time to answer 1000 med questions #
  • Wait. What part of a handicapped license plate on a motorcycle makes sense? #
  • Love getting into arguments with my sister of RN vs RPh. #
  • I just farted so loud my dog barked at my ass. #
  • If you want a site like mine, less anger but more funny: @ApothecaryTales http://www.apothecarytales.com #
  • Hahaha! Reliving the april fools 2008 joke between myself and @TAestP #
  • http://www.theangriestpharmacist.com/2008/04/01/recap/ & http://www.theangrypharmacist.com/archives/2008/04/sore_loser_boo_hoo.html #
  • The starting entry (with hatemail!) http://www.theangrypharmacist.com/archives/2008/04/sweet_victory_at_last.html #
  • My timeline involves bitching, revenge, fart/sex and jokes while @DrGhaheri tweets about the quality of his hard boiled eggs. Classic. #
  • Anyone here shave with a straight razor? Im tired of paying $20 for the stupid mach-whatever cartridges. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-08

  • Oh snap! Your coverage expired! Oh, its somehow my fault because I didnt tell you it was expiring when it was ON YOUR FUCKING CARD. #
  • See, I enjoy helping people, but I hate being your mother/father/only responsible person in your entire life. #
  • I think next crackhead who tries to rob us I'm going to duct tape him to a chair and see what 50cc's of Narcan does to him. #
  • Uppity pt: "GIVE ME A COPY OF THE RX SO MY NURSING STUDENT DAUGHTER CAN TELL ME IF ITS DONE CORRECTLY" Welcome to pharmacy folks. #
  • To hell with migrane proph. Just keep on throwing Imitrex at the problem. #
  • No ER doc, I shall not redo all a siezure pt's meds just cuz you said so. Im going to call his neurologist. #
  • Neurologist told me to disregard ER doc, he shall see pt, and thanks for looking out for him. #
  • What about Friday makes people more prone to lose/get stolen their narcotics? #
  • If I apply the Lancets Guidelines re: Autism then I can make a study that Vicodin use = retardation & annoyingness #
  • I want to slam my face into my desk right now. #
  • Im always amazed that people go to my site, then bitch because its too angry. Did you look at the URL you dipshit moron douchebags? #
  • Amazing how a simple guy, with a simple website, bitching about a profession that for 95% of the time he enjoys, can be the voice of retail #
  • Im also amazed that I've been doing this website gig for 5 years & have a ton of fans for a site that I created to just keep my own sanity. #
  • Its humbling because I have so many fans, yet at the same time sad because almost everyone feels the same way I do. #
  • My parents asked me tonight how that "angry website you make" was doing. I shrugged and said "fine". They cant comprehend the scope of it. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-07

  • Sorry dude, the pill you "found in your sons room" isn't a narc. You got burned. #
  • 10 min patient sob story out front and Im dreading them calling my name. #
  • Amazing how much concern I can show on my face when deep down I feel that this is so not my problem nor can I do anything about it. #
  • I hate being the human shield for some cowardly doctor who writes "No early refill" yet caves at the slightest pressure from the pt. #
  • Seriously, if you are going to write "No Early Fill" then balls up and stand up to the crying/yelling/whining like every pharmacist does #
  • Its amazing how much shit you should be taught in pharm school, yet arent (mostly dealing with people). What a waste of money. #
  • See my old worn out shoes? See your new boots and purse? See how you're bitching about $4 copay, see me really not caring? #
  • Purell hand sanitizer is superior to its generic counterpart. It just smells better. #
  • So if Jenny McCarthy's kid was killed by a dz prevented by MMR, would she still be anti-vaccine? #
  • Finally home. Time for the booze to start #
  • Hm, japanese food and Jack Daniels. Who says im not multicultural! #
  • So writing an autism/jenny mccarthy rant right now #
  • Wakefield excerpt: You should go have sex with Jenny McCarthy so maybe the common sense recessive trait could be expressed in your children. #
  • I think a Brazilian wax on a pregnant chick would be fascinating and horrid at the same time, like a train wreck. #

Angry Tweets for 2011-01-06

  • Patient just aruged with me stating that 2 x 50mg tablets she was on was different than the new Rx for 1 x 100mg tablet. #
  • Whats the point of you telling me "I'm low income". So? The price is the fucking price. Do you say that to the ppl who sell you cigs? #
  • We have replaced Mr Smiths Viagra with an 18 year old blonde with low self esteem and poor decision making skills, lets see if it works. #
  • If a guy said "Can ya give me a break on Viagra, I just wanna beat off to some hot dirty porn" I would sell them at cost. #
  • Wow, this Andrew Wakefield really screwed the pooch. BIG SURPRISE THERE! #