Category Archives: Angry Tweets

Angry Tweets for 2012-09-29

  • All in favor of putting winning lotto numbers on the Rx label so the pts will actually READ THE FUCKING THINGS say Aye… AYE! #
  • "Have my meds been ok'd yet?" *Looking through 5 non-narcs and one vicodin thats not been ok'd* "Nope, not your vicodin" "DAMN OKAY BYE!" #
  • If you call more than 3 times a day nagging me about your narc refills, you get a complementary CURES report faxed to all your doctors. #
  • You want to fix the profession of pharmacy? Allow us to drink on the job, allow us to charge a restocking fee, and dump gift cards. #
  • No joke, QOTW: "But Walmart filled 240 soma for me last week, why cant I get these from you today." Soma, killing brain-cells since 1959. #

Angry Tweets for 2012-09-22

  • I hate it when random idiots walk up when we call someone elses name as if its them. Learn your fucking name dipshit. #
  • Even my fucking dog knows its own name. Theres no reason why you cant learn how your own name sounds. #
  • And dont give me this "Well its not their native language" bullshit, they know enough to collect a fucking check every month. #
  • Unless you're a fan of giving an idiot someone elses medicine because they walk up all derpy when its busy to someone elses name. #
  • Warning stickers have done more harm to the human race than anything else put together. Way to shit in the gene pool warning stickers! #
  • Jesus fuck its been an uphill day today. Fucking shit be over please. #
  • FUCK! Friday after all the MD's have their phones rolled over. Cue the PITA pt who needs his shit OMFG RIGHT NOW. #
  • Some days all we need to keep from drinking ourselves to death is a smile and a thank you. Thats all. #
  • Okay, tell me twitter, how fucking hard it is to read on your bottle "0 refills remaining"? #
  • Its like we're asking the patients to do quantum physics by calling in early when they have no refills left. #
  • Is it really that fucking hard? They can work the lotto machine but cant read a fucking pill bottle? #
  • But oh, they sure can remember how many refills they had on their fucking vicodin and soma Rx's can they. They call those in 4 weeks early. #
  • I mean for crying out fucking loud, READ THE FUCKING BOTTLE. You can buy the right brand of Cigs so I know you can fucking read. #
  • I swear, sometimes I think the only way to get a simple concept through their brain is write it on a scratcher or a pack of cigs. #

Angry Tweets for 2012-09-13

  • Theres no mistake why Fentanyl, Friend, Fantastic, and Fabulous all start with the same letter. Oh, Versed is good too. #
  • QOTD during my procedure "I need more fentanyl. My face isnt numb and I haven't asked for an early refill yet" <– WTF? #
  • Then I got Versed, and the next thing I remember I was drinking out of a juice box while eating Wienerschnitzel. #
  • I dont remember how I got dressed, the car-ride home. My wife just said that I just repeated "I LOVE FENTANYL" over and over and over. #

Angry Tweets for 2012-09-12

  • Alright bitches, its almost showtime. GoLytely is chillin in the fridge.. The 4 docusate are ready to go, and im fucking starving. #
  • Alright, 4 ducolax are down, time for glass #1 #tapLytely #
  • Oh sweet jesus, this stuff tastes like ice cold piss #
  • Like seriously, this crap tastes horrible, and the flavor packets just give it a nasty after-taste. #tapLytely #
  • I have this sorta full bloaty feeling like my insides are going to have sex with a garden hose any moment. #taplytely #
  • You should see me. Shirtless (dont wanna hold it up the entire performance, pants around ankles, with magazines and OH SHIT. I FEEL SMTHING #
  • fuck you trilyte flavor packets, I bought green gatoraide powder. I want to use a blacklight afterwards to see how bad i splattered the can #
  • Good seal around toliet seat.. CHECK. Good hand holds for leverage.. CHECK. Plenty of TP.. CHECK. Phone so I can call for help.. CHECK. #
  • Pre-Lytely checklist is done. Waiting for launch. Currently waiting on the launchpad. #tapLytely #
  • Almost time for glass #2 The green tint of gatoraide makes this appear half way appealing. #tapLytely #
  • Oh my god its like the incredible hulk just came in my mouth. This shit can't be made palateable! #taplytely #
  • I just ran to get the power adapter to my laptop and a spoon. Its like the hot-potato game but with fluid in my asshole. Daring! #taplytely #
  • Man, I dont like this.. Nothing yet and im almost glass 3 in. When it goes, its going to be like a sewer main breaking #taplytely #
  • Glass 3, this time i actually stirred in the gatoraide and OH FFS WAY TOO MUCH POWDER #
  • fuck pants, im sitting on the can butt naked with just my socks on. I feel like a male porn star. #
  • If my wife comes in seeing me butt naked on twitter with just my socks on, im going to have a lot of explaining to do #tapLytely #
  • Oh damn Gina. I think its showtime! #
  • Glass 4. HULK SMASH! HULK FINISH IN TAPS MOUTH! HULK MAKE TAP PEE OUT OF BUTTHOLE! #tapLytely #
  • I swear that APhA should give me an award for the advancement of pharmacy via social media. #tapLytely #
  • glass 4 and nothing.. Oh.. wait.. I think its time for launch? #
  • I must say that #tapLytely is a whole lot more entertaining than the typical twitter politics and 9/11 rehashing thats going on today. #
  • Glass 5. Thats 40oz of fluid in my GI track #
  • My gut holds the same quantity of fluid as a bottle of Old English. Probably tastes the same too. #
  • So for drinking 40oz i dont feel nearly as bloated as you would think #
  • OH MY FUCKING GOD. #
  • I can see why the non-compliance of this treatment is so high. #
  • I'm going to post a full write-up of my experiences on my site when i get done. Patients need to be informed on what to expect. #
  • 10 min's go by so fast, and the fluid level in this jug goes down so slowly. #tapLytely #
  • I'm still alive. Its pretty anticlimatic. Sit around, asspee, sit around.. asspee. I think the exciting part has passed. #
  • I have never been so afraid to sneeze in my life. #tapLytely #

Angry Tweets for 2012-09-11

  • Reminder, my live tweetcast of a gallon of go-lytely doing the indy 500 through my GI track starts tomrorow, ~7pm Pacific. #
  • Regarding Tomorrow: "This shit is going to be off the hook! And down my legs, and splattered on the back of my balls, my ass, etc" #
  • I have instructed the wife go stock up on toliet paper. Or maybe a ShamWOW. #taplytely #
  • There must be an impatient asshole crackhead virus going around. Day has been nothing but them. #
  • In 24 hours I will be preventing lift-off and nursing the biggest hickey on my ass-cheeks ever. #
  • So if I swallow a bag full of gummi-bears whole, then chase it with go-lytely, i wonder if ATF would consider that a firearm. #